Depression

Depression… well why are we still depressed with so much research…

It’s a question I have asked myself over and over again! The medical field will always give an academia response! Well that is not always helpful! Also attending therapy is tough for so many reasons…

  • For one you know you are on the clock and that makes it feel insensitive. It makes it feel you are just a dollar sign. (Understood we all need to make a living, I am in the field so I know but that’s the feeling for many adults/teens not children)
  • When you see your therapist looking at the clock it tends to shut down the process.
    It’s expensive, using organic natural medicine can be expensive as well.
  • Also it’s a place for someone to listen to you, validate you and guide you in creating tools.
  • There is no magic, no quick fix, no medication that makes it go away. That is what the individual wants, is for it to go away!!!!
  • Medication has so many downfalls and so many other side effects. It also does not work forever and some of it is addictive! How do we win this battle of depression!?!?

iu-1

I have to disappoint you by saying that there will always be sad days but suffering from depression is crippling.

So it’s all about a combination of things but managing depression starts with US! There is no way around that, the motivation has to come from within US! A ROUTINE has to be created! Such as:

  • Getting up every morning, taking a shower, brushing your teeth and having a warm herbal tea. Even if this is what happens for a few weeks.
  • Then introducing uplifting music to your day versus silence. Starting a simple task: journaling, reading a book, painting, colouring, writing letters, or watching a lighthearted show.
  • Getting outside for a walk among nature is extremely important. Feeling the fresh air on your skin, hearing the birds sing, the smell of the trees, the feel of the air on your skin, and getting your body to move.
  • Healing your thoughts is so important and managing that song & dance we do with ourselves. It is important to navigate our thoughts, as they can dismantle friendships, working relationships and families. Getting control of those thoughts and filtering through what is accurate.
  • Today, mediation is so important. It helps us quiet our minds so we can actually see what is going on around us.
  • Looking at using vitamins such as; 5-HTP, Vitamin D, Magnesium, or *St. John’s Wort.
  • Reading self help books along with attending therapy. (Will have some links below)
  • It is so important to not smoke, use alcohol, marijuana, or other substances as it does trigger symptoms of depression.
  • Herbal teas are essential and essentials oil in your home. Using crystals on you is extremely helpful as it holds your energy. Looking at what works for you and then implementing it into your daily life. Most important be with nature whenever you can and animals!
  • Decrease in electronics such as; phones, TVs, computers and all these addictive tools! Pick up a magazines or book instead!!

Often times when we are experiencing a moment of depression, all of our views are under a microscope. We create a set of emotions that are amplified, dramatic, sensational towards a set of different scenarios. At these moments we can’t separate truth from fiction. We then lose friendships through making unreasonable decisions and unfortunately there will be those times that you will not be able to make amends. Not everyone will understand that you went through a moment of sabotaging everything in sight.

These types of situations stem from distrust created in your childhood. This is the beginning of where trauma is created. Many are not so fortunate to have had a blissful childhood. This is where you should have been protected and had an abundance of love. Often it is here the damage begins and where it leads to so many distorted thoughts. This is where many develop anxiety, depression, low self esteems, insecurities, self destructive behaviours and so forth. In saying all this…

In order to reach recovery, it needs multiple of layers. It will need a combination at times of psychotropic medications, counselling, mindfulness, yoga, vitamins, meditation, and essentially a treatment plan that works for you. This will help you towards becoming a healthy adult and one day, if this is your choice, to be a better parent! You need to rediscovery yourself, build self love, heal all wombs, be open to change and feedback!

Often times you have to look at creating a treatment plan that helps you heal. It can be built through meditation, yoga, journalling, writing, painting, mindfulness activities, adult colouring, volunteering and helping others. This list goes on but you have to find what will work for you and dedicate to your healing. Dedicate to changing the dance to a more positive outcome, as this is possible but takes a lot of work and overcoming our fears. The love you seek is through your well being. Needing to accept gratitude to begin healing depression. You most likely will always have those sad days just not daily. It is knowing to cope with that and being able to manage those days so it does not consume your months and years.

I hope that this blog will find you well! Below I will now list a few links to places I recommend and suggestions to tools:

  1. https://itsallaboutyou.ca (it has many different types of spiritual therapies, and medicine)
  2. https://www.whitelotusclinic.ca (Get trusted natural and nutritional treatments for hormone balance. Our focused practice offers supportive and compassionate care led by lab testing and research. Established in 2001, our licensed Naturopathic Doctors collectively offer many years of clinical experience)
  3. https://theherbalclinicanddispensary.com (Our Herbalists and Dispensary Assistants have in-depth knowledge of herbal medicine, including the optimal therapeutic uses of medicinal plants. We stock a very wide selection of medicinal herbs. Our herbs are of the highest quality. We source cultivated organic or wildcrafted herbs whenever possible and we try to support local farmers)
    Links to useful products:
Dance of anger          click this link o go to the book directly
Anger is something we feel. It exists for a reason and always deserves our respect and attention. We all have a right to everything we feel—and certainly our anger is no exception.”Anger is a signal and one worth listening to,” writes Dr. Harriet Lerner in her renowned classic that has transformed the lives of millions of readers. While anger deserves our attention and respect, women still learn to silence our anger, to deny it entirely, or to vent it in a way that leaves us feeling helpless and powerless. In this engaging and eminently wise book, Dr. Lerner teaches both women and men to identify the true sources of anger and to use it as a powerful vehicle for creating lasting change. For decades, this book has helped millions of readers learn how to turn their anger into a constructive force for reshaping their lives. With a new introduction by the author, The Dance of Anger is ready to lead the next generation.)
Dance of connection         Click this link to go to the book directly
(The key problem in relationships, particularly over time, is that people begin to lose their voice. Despite decades of assertiveness training and lots of good advice about communicating with clarity, timing, and tact, women and men find that their greatest complaints in marriage and other intimate relationships are that they are not being heard, that they cannot affect the other person, that fights go nowhere, that conflict brings only pain. Although an intimate, long-term relationship offers the greatest possibilities for knowing the other person and being known, these relationships are also fertile ground for silence and frustration when it comes to articulating a true self. And yet giving voice to this self is at the center of having both a relationship and a self. Much as she did in THE MOTHER DANCE, Lerner will approach this rich subject with tales from her personal life and clinical work, inspiring and teaching readers to speak their own truths to the most important people in their lives.)
Dance of Fear          Click this link to go to the book directly
(Unhappiness, says bestselling author Harriet Lerner, is fueled by three key emotions: anxiety, fear, and shame. They are the uninvited guests in our lives. When tragedy or hardship hits, they may become our constant companions. Anxiety can wash over us like a tidal wave or operate as a silent thrum under the surface of our daily lives. With stories that are sometimes hilarious and sometimes heartbreaking, Lerner takes us from “fear lite” to the most difficult lessons the universe sends us. We learn: how a man was “cured in a day” of the fear of rejection – and what we can learn from his story, how the author overcame her dread of public speaking when her worst fears were realized, how to deal with the fear of not being good enough, and with the shame of feeling essentially flawed and inadequate, how to stay calm and clear in an anxious, crazy workplace, how to manage fear and despair when life sends a crash course in illness, vulnerability, and loss, how “positive thinking” helps – and harms, how to be our best and bravest selves, even when we are terrified and have internalized the shaming messages of others.)

I hope this blog finds you all well and that you are able to take something that will be useful for you.

“Don’t rush anything. When the time is right, it’ll happen. A ruffled mind makes a restless  pillow.”

Love LucyLu

Depression

Depression is a life journey… tomorrow will be a better day…

Family: childhood

I dread living in the past or thinking of the past as it often brings me to tears. This is always the moment that I realize I still have a lot of healing to do and that is okay.

Let me state I have actually done a lot of work on myself through therapy, meditation, yoga, essential oils and so forth… it all works together and YES there will be those days or months or years that you just get caught in that cycle of trauma. That is okay, as our tool box of strategies will pull you out of that dark hole. Once you believe in yourself and love YOU that gets you through those dark moments.

This is the song and dance we do from time to time and what helps me get through it is the confidence in myself and my positive self talk.

During these moments: I step outside in my bare feet and step on the cold floor and feel all the sensations. I then affirm the love I have to be alive, to see the blue skys, to hear the sounds of the birds… this grounds me. In this moment I am able to shift my thoughts to positivity and use my strategies to get me out of this gloomy feeling.

I MYSELF have many disappointments in all areas, my own deep traumas but I know they do not define me but are my journey and success to overcoming those moments and individuals!

We live in a place where there are triggers everywhere, so acknowledging those feelings as I have done today, deal with those feelings and move along for the day.

Today I decided to share within the moment, of my sadness and how I work it through without much of the details, which I will share with you… along the way of our journey together.

My line of work was no mistake for me and I made an oath to aways do this work through love and not through my own experiences, as no one situation is the same. We may connect through a similar event but the strategy and feelings will be different.

Though I have my studies, my own struggle through this life journey is what helped me connect genuinely and try to understand the walks of others. It has made me be able to always check my own emotions surfacing when working with young people and to listen to their stories.

Never underestimate your knowledge, wisdom and impact you have of those that cross your path. A caring gesture truly goes a long way.

  • The earth was my grounding, positive affirmations and meditation music.
  • A show of the jungle and connecting to the sounds of the animal kingdom helped me smile and know it will be a better day tomorrow.
  • Reading blogs of others on WordPress helped me connect with others with similar stories.
  • A favourite cup of coffee, some banana bread and alone time.
  • I placed all my diffusers on with lavender, 🍋, 🍊, and bergamot.

I hope this finds someone having a sad day and that these strategies may help you through today!

“Everyday brings new discoveries” unknown

“My future days of this weekend: have a daily walk, take a photo of nature and smile at a stranger! “ Lucylu

Calmness is a huge gift. And once you master it, you will be able to respond in a useful way to every difficult situation that decides to walk into your heart!

With Love 💕 ,

Lucylu

Coping through holidays/celebrations

Reflect, Connect, Laugh and help others…

Christmas is here, lights are bright, trees are festive, fires are burning and the smells of chestnuts are everywhere! December is my happiest month and my saddest month.

I love seeing a fresh new snow fall…. it is so beautiful to watch from the bay window and it’s flakes fall onto the tips of the evergreen trees. You hear the birds chirping in the early mornings and you feel the crisp air on your swollen cheeks. The tip of your nose slightly red… just like rudolf! The homes have beautiful decorations, flowers, and props. It just makes you smile as everywhere you go looks so festive. The streets of downtown Toronto are full of people, tourists and seasonal activities! The distillery has the Christmas market and the decorations are stunning. There are such unique shops with artisans creative work that make such great gifts. The smell of hot chocolate is everywhere you walk. You see parents, children, couples and friends stopping to enjoy a drink and some food. You hear chatter and laughter and all is so bright!

“It is a gift to see so many families wrapped up in each other during this holiday season!”

I sit with my eyes close and absorb all the sounds, smells, and conversations. Everyone around gives away free smiles, small conversations and helpful gestures. It is such a beautiful time of the year!

It’s a time many connect with their faith, celebrate and give to their communities! It’s a time of gathering with friends and families. You share food, drinks and memories with all those you love. You take a moment to stop and actually enjoy/share time with those you love. It’s a time we stop work, distractions and actually listen! Children/ youth are playing, sharing and so excited to be around their family & friends. They notice the adults are attentive and not stressed! Music is playing Christmas classics and it’s such a beautiful ring tone to my ears! Christmas movies are on the TV and the Nutcracker is in the theatres again! Christmas has always been a time for families to get together and make new memories.

Though in saying all of the above… December/January is some of the saddest months! As I know there are many people suffering and during these moments becomes a reminder of what they are missing. I have mentioned to you all, I have worked as a Child and Youth Practitioner… so throughout these 27 years I have seen the sadness that is hidden in Ontario.

This article is to provide tools and suggestions to help cope through any difficult moments this holiday season can bring up… and a reminder for those who are much more fortunate to help others.

During these months of December/January is when many children are feeling abandoned as they witness others with families and enjoying dinners at different homes. There are youth in the system that have families that they spend time with but this leaves the homes empty for the others left behind. There are elders that do not have families around anymore, lost loved ones, significant others have passed. We have individuals living on the streets that witness the festivities which reminds them of their situations/loses/loneliness. This is also a time that many services give out meals, clothing, sleeping bags, gifts, groceries, toys and the list just grows! This allows so many individuals to get through the winter months. Please take the time to read these strategies if you are in need, if you are not… please be kind to those in great moods or not… as we do not actually know their struggle! So your smile could actually be saving a life!

Strategies below:

  • Complete a family activity called Worry Dolls. Create a decorated box that will fit wooden popsicle sticks. Now you will need 5 popsicles, some yarn, and a black pen/marker. Some pieces of felt. Create each doll to relate to all of your worries and on the back of your popsicles name your worries. You then place this box under your pillow during the night to help take away your worries. Every night you tell your worry dolls all that has bothered you throughout the day.
  • If you are struggling please call the suicide hotline at 1-833-456-4566 or TEXT: 45645 Also here is the website which has other numbers that you can access:
  • https://www.crisisservicescanada.ca/en/
  • Acknowledge your emotions and book a therapy session online or in person. Organize this ahead of time and do not ignore the emotions before it becomes unmanageable.
  • Journal your thoughts, write a love letter to yourself or mail a letter to yourself. The release of words is so powerful.
  • Listen to light calm music.
  • Get outside, move your body, take a break from screen time and take some baths.
  • Engage in deep breathing techniques
  • Make amends with friends and families. Pick your battles and recognize is this fight worth it?
  • If things become unbearable, go to the CAMH emergency hospital. Located at 250 College Street and open 24 hours a day. Their number is 416-979-6885.
  • Link to breathing strategies:
Please share this post with others that may benefit…


Sincerely with love,


LucyLu
anxiety

When I see a bench…

I love grabbing a cup of coffee, my journal and heading out among nature. The moment I find a bench, I sit and begin people watching. Have you ever done this? Hahaha… We all have, humans are so interesting to watch due to their many unique traits. 
Well, as I sit on my bench... what I enjoy most is having someone notice me, and within that moment... we both smile and share a friendly smirk! That small interaction changes your entire day. I notice that I will have a bounce to my walk, a smile on my face, and a positive attitude for that entire day! If only everyday started this way, RIGHT? 
Well, we all know that this is not always the case, there are moments when we wake up with ANXIETY and oh boy does that change the day! So lets talk about anxiety; at times it can definitely make us over-react, have negative self-talk, feel anxious, nervous, uncomfortable, uneasy, isolate ourselves, worry, make tons of assumptions and this list just continues to grow as the day proceeds. WOW, in saying all this, out loud it makes you realize how tough ANXIETY can be. 
So before I continue I want to TELL you, please be KIND to yourself and realize living with anxiety is by far an easy task. Hey, if this is you, well of course you wake up exhausted! You are dealing with an invisible struggle, that our world is at times unkind about. We live in a time that states to us all that we must be HAPPY, well, that is not always so easy to do. With social media always lurking, RIGHT, it even makes it that much harder. I don't know about you but social media always paints such a pretty picture, which influences our thought's at the beginning of our day. 
Today, this is an added stressor for too many of our young people, they have a lot more pressures to deal with and this is a consistent reminder of how unperfected their life really is. Today... I am glad I didn't grow up with social media mainly because it eliminated one less problem to worry about! As the journey of life is a beautiful one but not an easy one! 
This is the fun part, I share with you some strategies: take a break from all social media platforms, start with an hour, two hours, 4 hours, 8 hours and then a whole day. Pick up a good book, call a friend, go for a walk, get outside, watch a show/movie, take a bath in Epson salt and lavender oil, listen to meditation music, try yoga, do some breathing techniques, colouring and paint. Here are some suggestions to increase happiness: do things that increases your happiness, get sleep, eat well, exercise, forgive yourself, enjoy the small moments, do not compare yourself to others, and give to others your kindness/compliments/help. I ask you all to try some of these strategies. These strategies help calm the brain and nervous system. It helps distract your thoughts and helps your mind to begin to feel positive, which in fact decreases your anxious feelings. 
The key is you have to try, make the changes and see which ones work. I continue to make changes all the time and I have become use to change. I do not like change but I love watching the positive growth more. My goal in this life is to achieve happiness and I am now willing to try anything that helps to make me feel better! I encourage you to start somewhere... at least you start. All change truly starts with us and it takes a lot of work. ARE YOU NOT WORTH IT, the answer is YES you are!
With Kindness,
LucyLu

“When we are unable to find tranquility within ourselves, it is useless to seek it elsewhere.”

“Music comes from an icicle as it melts, to live again as spring water” -Henry Williamson

Music is medicine for your soul, take a moment and try some calming melodies throughout your day!

With love,

Lucylu